


Hello Happy World & A Pickle Jar

by Magolima



Category: BanG Dream! (Anime), BanG Dream! Girl's Band Party! (Video Game)
Genre: Explosions, Explosives, F/F, Graphic Violence against a jar, Humor, It's a simple task, Misaki probably already have some white hair treads, Near Death Experiences, literal title, nothing to worry about
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-16
Updated: 2020-12-16
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:42:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,429
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28114077
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Magolima/pseuds/Magolima
Summary: It's just the Hello Happy World trying to open pickle jar, simple isn't It?
Relationships: Okusawa Misaki/Tsurumaki Kokoro
Comments: 2
Kudos: 35





	Hello Happy World & A Pickle Jar

**Author's Note:**

> I decided to write this fic after I couldn't open a box juice lid and I had to open a hole in It with a knife to drink the juice. I had no other option...

Today was finally the day that HaroHapi decided to discuss some new live and song ideas that would bring a lot of happiness to everyone, but they never expected that today was also a day that they would confront one of the biggest challenge of their lives.

"Hagumi, this pickle jar is too tight! I can't open It." Kokoro and Hagumi were in the mansion dining room, where they always have their meetings, waiting for the other members to arrive, but Kokoro end up getting hungry in the process so she decided to eat some pickles, but regardless of the strength she put the lid didn't move.

"Let me try, Kokoron. &I'm filled with the energy of the croquettes I ate earlier today." Hagumi then picked the jar with Kokoro and tried to open It, but she couldn't open it either, even after trying in a variety of different ways, like with her non dominant hand or even upside down.

"It's really tight, Kokoron. How can we open It?"

"Hmm... Two hands are better than one, right? If we use two hands to hold the lid, there's no doubt we can open It."

"That's a great idea!"

Following this effective plan, the two of them grabbed the the jar together. Kokoro was holding the glass part while Hagumi had both hands over the lid ready to open It. "One, two, three, go!" Both girls were trying their best to open the jar, but in the end they tired without move the lid even a millimeter.

Not giving up, Kokoro once again picked the jar and started to look for any weakness that could help them to open It. "That jar is almost like the tale of the sword in the stone, maybe It can only opened by a chosen knight or prince."

In that very same instant that Kokoro Said the word prince, a fleeting purple-haired guitarist entered the room. "What a beautiful day my kittens, perhaps I heard someone saying 'prince'?"

"Kaoru!" "Kaoru-kun!"

Just like a prince, Kaoru arrived when her kittens needed some help. When she heard the word prince by the other side of the door, she knew that they were se referring to her and that she arrived at the right time.

"Kaoru-kun, we couldn't open this pickle jar by ourselves, maybe you can do It."

"Help my kittens to open a jar that they had so much struggle trying to do It? There's nothing that could bring me more joy to this beating heart of my than that. Let me have this jar." Kaoru than picked the jar with Kokoro ang get ready to open It. Everyone who know Kaoru well would able to tell by looking how determined she is, that this battle was already decided and is just a matter of time to It's end.

"Kaoru-kun!!!" Hagumi is shaking a almost fainting Kaoru that is lying in the floor with the pickle jar slowly rolling over her gripless hand to the floor.

Of course, the matter of time was referring to how long would take to Kaoru fall on the floor after using her entire strength trying to open It. Kaoru usually is one your last options of people you can aks to help you to open a jar, but there's always some cases that her bandmtes or fans ask her to do something of the genre that do not end up very well for obvious reasons.

"That jar was a really tough opponent, maybe I have underestimated It." Said Karou while lifting from the floor after recover some energy.

"If no one here is strong enough to open It, how do we gonna eat those pickles?" Hagumi asked, doubting if they would still eat the jar content.

"My dear Hagumi, If we can't reach something using the force, there is always the possibility to reach It by It's feelings."

"That's perfect! We just need to make the jar smile and It will open for us." Kokoro declared their next action, ready to do what she does the best.

* * *

The three of them tried their best to please the jar, giving It a bath, drying It's lid with a hair dryer, telling It some good stories, playing boardgames with It, playing some songs to It and many other things, but the only difference in the jar is that It is now cleaner and shinier.

"Apparently, It's heart is as hard to reach as the pickles inside It. This jar is really dedicated to It's purpose."

"I'm out of ideas, do you have one, Kokoron?" Hagumi was trying to come up with some ideas just like someone who's choosing a new product for a bakery, but nothing came in her mind.

"Hmm... Misaki always say that we're to straightforward and that sometimes even If following a straight line is the fastest way, It doesn't mean is also the best one, so maybe we're doing something wrong."

"If Mii-kun said It so must be true. We just need to find another way to open the jar without be direct."

"But how we gonna find a alternative path to do something that is basically a straight line that anyone would follow?" Kaoru made the question they all were thinking. It wouldn't be easy to find a side path in a task like opening a jar, If they at least had an expert to help them.

At this moment, the three girls heard the door being opened and the one who just entered was a jellyfish enthusiast that they know very well. "Sorry for being late, did you waited too much?"

"Kanon!" "Kanon-chan-senpai!" "Kanon!"

"What happened?" Kanon know that her band is very energetic, but they don't call someone name in unison like that without a reason.

"You arrived at the right time. We're trying to open this pickle jar for a while, but we couldn't do it, perhaps do you know some way to open It?" Kokoro approached Kanon and started to press the jar against her.

"Well, the most important factor in opening a pickle jar is technique, not strength. I'm kinda used to open the jars at home, so let me try open this one." Kanon then picked the jar that Kokoro was giving to her and tried to open It. The secret to open a tight jar is how you hold It and the vector force applied to the lid, that is the way that Kanon always manage to open every jar without any troub-.

"Well, there's no use after all. I never saw a jar so tight like this one before." Every technique she know about the art of opening jars end up being totally ineffective against the tightness of this jar.

"Are you saying that is impossible to open this jar?"

"Of course not, Hagumi-chan. There's also some tricks to we can use to open a jar in cases like thos one."

"As expected from our Kanon, always find some alternative paths even in the straightest of the ways." Kaoru was impressed how Kanon just arrived and alredy had the solution for their problem.

"Thank you... Wait." Kanon couldn't help but to feel happy for being praised. Well, at least until she realized that the praise was some kinda rude. "Well, I think we should start trying to open It after heating the lid to expand It."

"We already dryed the lid with the hair dryer after the jar's bath, but nothing changed." Hagumi was the one who waghed It's head and dryed It too, so she would have realized If the lid loosen up.

"I see, If that's the case, then give me a spoon."

Hearing Kanon's request, Kokoro rushed to the kitchen to pick up a spoon for the operation. She needed the right tool for the work, so she choose the mais brighter one that she found to bring back to the dining room.

"Here is the spoon you asked for, this one will do?"

"Thanks, Kokoro-chan. This one will work perfectly." Kanon then picked the spoon with her dominant hand and carefully forced It's tip between the lip of the lid and the the jar. She was using the spoon as lever to open to create a tiny gap that would release the airtight seal of the jar, but no matter how many times she tried different spots around the lid or how much strength she applied, Kanon couldn't open the gap. She never saw a jar like this before and her astonishment grew even more when in the last attempt the spoon end up breaking in two parts. "Fueee?! How did the spon broke?"

"Maybe It was a cheap spoon, those bend really easily after some time." Hagumi remembered the times the same thing happened in her family meat shop.

"I think all the kitchen utensils in this house are made from high carbon steel If I'm not wrong." Kokoro cusually replied, don't realizing the bomb she just dropped.

"H-High carbon steel!?" Kanon started to look at the broken spoon in her hand, thinking how a pickle jar managed to break something so hard.

"If this this jar is tight enough to do something like that to this spoon, there's no other choice but to use our last resource." Kanon then approached Kokoro and whispered something in her ear. The blonde girl didn't waste any time and leave the room as soon she heard what Kanon said. The other two memebers in the room were apprehensive about what her friend mean with 'last resource', but their questions were answered after they saw that Kokoro just returned but this time holding a sledgehammer and a bowl. "If we can't remove the lid, the only way to reach the pickle is breaking the jar." 

"I see... I think we were to naive for thinking that this operation would end with a completely happy ending, sometimes sacrifices need to be made to reach the desire of our souls." Kaoru wasn't satisfied that things ended up like that, but she understands that It is necessary.

Kanon then placed the jar in the table and hold the sledgehammer with both hands, she wouldn't crush It entirely, besides she wanted to make a mess all over the table, so she will only use enough strength to crack the glass and only definitely open It when the jar be in the bowl.

Kanon tighten her grip on the sledgehammer while hearing her friends cheering for her to give her more motivation, but they end up motivating her way too much. In response to the support from her friends, Kanon got nervous, making her exaggerate in the strength that she applied on the sledgehammer, and It sure would be enough to break the jar on the spot, but... "Eh?"

The jar received the blow but remained intact.

"Fueeeee! But how is that even possible?"

"I think we can explain It."

"Eh?"

Three figures in black suits suddenly appeared in the room without anyone noticing their arrival. "Due to the recent incident of the cookie jar that almost fall over Kokoro-sama head, Okusawa-sama complained about how this house kitchen is not safe enough to Kokoro-sama levels, so we remodeled the entire kitchen aiming Kokoro-sama safety, sharpless knifes, a bubble cooker, glasses for the microwave and many other features."

"I don't think that was what Misaki-chan meant." Kanon saind in low voice. Looks like her friend still have a long way to go in this romantic life with her rich and very energetic girlfriend.

"If It was made to Kokoron do not casually break It, don't we just need to do something out of the usual to break It?"

"You're right, Hagumi. We can't break It with just a everyday tool, we need to use heavy armament."

"It's like how the war sages through the history have always said 'If you couldn't defeat you enemy in the first battle, you just need to bring a bigger weapon next time'."

"Well, It's worth trying." Kanon wished that Misaki was already here, she's good at dealing with this kind of situation, and even If she didn't know what to do, her sarcastic comments always help Kanon to relax in those times.

* * *

"We're finally ready to get those pickles!" Declared Kokoro while holding a huge drill in her arms, but she's not the only one in possession of a high destructive capacity tool, Hagumi was holding a chainsaw, Kaoru a abnormally large blowtorch and Kanon a jackhammer. The suits were the ones who gave them those equipments to try open the pickle jar by force.

"I will go first." Kokoro decided to be the first one to use their new equipments. She held the jar horizontally using a walrus and carefully placed the tip of the drill in middle of the lid. Kokoro turned the drill on at Its maximum power and started to open a hole in the jar, but It was having no effect. After five minutes trying the four girls noticed that there was smoke coming out of the drill, but It was too late, because the drill was so overcharged that It exploded in the very instant they noticed that something was wrong, spreading smoke throughout the room.

_Cough!* Cough!* Cough!* Cough!*_

"Don't worry, Kokoron, I will do It!" Hagumi then pulled the starter rope and fired the chainsaw engine, then sheslowly lowered the saw on the jar's half. In the instant that the chainsaw met the jar several sparks started to fly from It, luckily Hagumi was wearing protection equipment. Hagumi keep trying to saw the jar in two until the the sparks stopped appearing, because when she lifted the chainsaw to rest a little she saw that the chains were all broken.

"Let me try my kittens, I will do my best end this mission." Kaoru lowered her welding mask and lighted the blowtorch, she put the hot flame on the lid and started the heat It in order to make It loose or If it doesn't work, melt It. Seeing that It wasn't hot enough, Kaoru turned on the hellish blowtorch mode, that release a huge flame and the heat limits that It can exert are multiplied in order of magnitude. The new flame is so hot that It heated the room to the point that some chairs and their own clothes started to ignite just for be in the room, luckily this mode consume the gas really quick so they just have to extinguish the fire in her clothes just a few times. When the gas run out, they could see that the jar was red from being so being heated so much, but as soon It cooled down they saw that the jar was still intact.

"I guess It's my turn." Sincerely, Kanon don't want to do this, she don't know how no one got hurted yet but she don't want to create more chances for this to happen, but she's not strong enought to fight agaisnt the flow of the situation.

Kanon then removed the jar from the walrus and placed It on the floor, placing her jackhammer above It. She turned the jackhammer on to try to break the jar, but she didn't take long to realize that the results were the same as the previous ones, so she decided to turn on the tubo mode, for her own regret. "Fuueeeeeeeeeeeee!!!" The turbo mode was certainly stronger than the previous one, but It was way too strong for Kanon to handle, so she end up being carried by the jackhammer, spinning around It at an incredibly high speed.

After some minutes spinning like that, Kanon couldn't resist anymore and was thrown away, leaving the jackhammer alone, so It didn't take long for It to lose control and start walking by Itself, breaking the floor which It walks over. Its reign of chaos only ended because It moved too far from the power plug and ended up unplugging from the wall.

"It's not over yet, If we use our secret weapon, I'm sure we will open the jar!" Kokoro knew that all attempts so far have failed and her friends are tired after so many accidents envolving their equipment, but she has confidence in her trump card. So, Kokoro placed the jar over the table once again and started to make the preparations to use of the secret weapon.

The three other members didn't know about any secret weapon and they also couldn't see what Kokoro was doing with the jar because she's covering the view. They barely had time to think about It before being interrupted by the noise of a opening door.

"Sorry guys, my little sister needed some help with her homework and I decided to help her, but It took longer than I expected." The one who arrived was the DJ of this energetic band.

"Mii-kun!" "Misaki!" "Misaki-chan!"

"What happened here?" Saind Misaki looking at the destroyed room.

"It's a long story."

"Say no more, I'm two hundred percent sure that Kokoro is involv- KOKORO, WHAT THE HELL YOU ARE DOING!?!"

Everyone got surprised with Misaki's sudden scream, so they turned their heads toward Kokoro just to see her alongside several dynamites that were covering the pickle jar.

"Guys, our secret weapon is finally ready to use!" That was Kokoro said, but It isn't just ready to use. Actually, the timer of the detonator is already working and the rest of the band could clearly see that thay had only five seconds left until the explosion.

Misaki was the first one to react the deadly situation. She quickly rushed to Kokoro and grabbed her by the shirt collar to get her out of there, doing the same with her friends on the way back. Pulling two bandmates on each hand, Misaki get them out the room and quickly closed the room's door just before the huge explosion, that sended the door flying away together with what was left inside the room.

The five girls who also were sent flying by the shock of the explosion were lying on floor of the hall, surrounded by pieces of the room furniture, the wreckage of your equipment and, of course, a untouched pickle jar.

As the girls started to raise, they started to process the current situation, because It happened so fast that they're yet to realize how they almost lost their lives a few seconds ago. But the thing they are most sure of, is the fact that Misaki saved everyone, so she end being overwhelmed by the hugs of the other four band members.

"Misaki! You finally arrived! You lost most of the fun, do you know?"

"That was so cool! Mii-kun arrived and saved everyone from the explosion."

" _The hero always arrives late,_ I think this saying could not be more true. Just like a knight who protect the princess from the dragon's flames, you arrived and saved us from the explosion."

"I'm glad you arrived, Misaki-chan. The things get out of control and I couldn't do nothing about It, I don't know what would happened If you hadn- Misaki-chan?"

Until now, the four of them were so busy hugging Misaki that they didn't even looked at her face, but when they finally did, Misaki wasn't wearing her usual calm and causual expression, instead% her face was so scary that could make people with a weak heart loose the strength in the legs just with a glance, It made everyone stop hugging her to retreat to a safe position.

"Can't I even take my eyes out you guys without you cause a disaster?! A dynamite, really? What is It, a old cartoon? I don't know why were you playing with dynamite, but I'm hundred percent sure that was totally unnecessary and only served to destroy the entire dining room." Misaki sighed while putting a hand on her face. She may just arrived but she's feeling tired worth a entire day right now. "...You're truly unbelievable, I didn't believe that anyone woud need a lecture about do not playing with explosives, but you act like this accident was just another tuesday."

Seeing that Misaki was worried about them, Kokoro hugged her once again. "We know you're worried, Misaki, but you don't need to worry so much. Maybe we get you angry, but I'm sure If you join us, you will see how fun It was and you won't need to worry about leaving us alone."

"Kokoro..." Misaki approached Kokoro's face, placed her hands on each side of her head and... Started to shake It until Kokoro get dizzy. "Didn't you heard any word I just said?! It won't be fun because there's no fun in dying, something that almost happened with you four If I haven't arrived in time, so quit appealing for feelings.

"You may be thinking I'm mad about the dynamite, but that just one of the reasons. I bet you thought I didn't have realized, but I know very well that you're all guilty. A drill, a chainsaw, a blowtorch and a jackhammer, those are the tools I can identify by the wreckage on the floor and each one of them are _coincidentally_ in the blacklist of tools that I forbade you to use It for your own safety and judging by your looks, you probably had trouble with them too, right?"

Because how fast the things escalated, the four member who participated in the pickle jar operation didn't realized until Misaki brought It up that their bodies were completely dirty by the smoke that the drill realeased and their clothes were pretty much burned up by the blowtorch flame, so they couldn't say nothing to refute Misaki.

"I will take your silence as a confirmation that everyone here is at fault, even you, Kanon-san. I know It's hard to fight against the flow of events and restrain those three is not a job for everyone, but It doesn't change that fact you let the things get out of control. Well, at least you are not as guilty as those three."

Kanon expected Misaki to point out to Kokoro, Hagumi and Kaoru like usual, but she got surprised when she actually pointed to the suits, who were not too far from them.

"You were the ones who gave them those equipments so you are the biggest culprits of this mess. I'm still trying to understand how did you think that give Kokoro dynamite was a good idea, is the same thing as lend a knife to a crab, someone will get hurt. Do you have anything to declare?"

The Suits could be with wearing the usual expressionless face and sunglasses, but everyone could tell that they were looking away right now.

"Well, I will have a talk with you three later, so coming back to those four..." Misaki then keep lecturing them until she calmed down and have repeated at leat three times what she wanted to say. "I hope you think twice after doing something so stupid again, but I think It's already time to clean yourselves and change your clothes, your new ones are probably already in the changing room, so you are dismissed."

* * *

After they washed their bodies, the group of four went to the changing room and saw that the clothes prepared for them are identical to the ones they were wearing.

"Woah! Mii-kun was really right about the clothes, It's like she's a kind of boss."

"Hehe! Misaki-chan really looks like the house owner sometimes. Well, I think she needs to." Kanon turned her head and looked at Kokoro, the one who actually lives here, with a gentle smile.

When they already changed their clothes and came back to the destroyed dining room, they realized that the room wasn't destroyed anymore. It looks like they managed to repair the whole room while they were gone and Misaki was already waiting for them inside.

So they finally started their awaited meeting, and since Misaki was the one in charge of the lives and songs this time, she's telling her band the plans she made.

"How I was saying, I found a good date that we can peform at the hospi- _mogumogu*_ , but you need to remember that we c- _mogumogu*_ and about the new song, I have It right here so I want you to- _mogumogu*_ , did you get It?"

Actually, they didn't get It at all because Misaki was eating during her explanation. They also couldn't tell what she was eating because she was taking the food from somewhere under the table and her hand covered the food each time she put It in her mouth.

"Misaki-chan, what are you eating?" Kanon was the one who asked what they all wanted to know.

"Ah. Sorry about that, I was a bit hungry so I opened a pickle jar that I found, perhaps I couldn't have eaten It?" Misaki placed the open jar on the table that she was holding under the It until now.

"EEEEEEEEHHH!!!"

The four girls who knew this jar were in shock, they had so much trouble to only try to open It and Misaki appears with It open as if It were no big deal, It was basically a miracle.

"Misaki! You did It!" Kokoro was happy that Misaki was able to finish what they couldn't, that she climbed on top of the chair and jumped towards Misaki, crossing over the the table with open arms.

"Kokoro, wai-" Before Misaki could even end her sentence, Kokoro already had landed over her, knocking them both down together with the chair. "Can you at least warn me be-." Misaki was about to complain about Kokoro knocking her off the chair, but she stopped when she felt the blond passionating hug, she wouldn't admit It but It's a feeling she really likes so she wants to stay like this at least for a while.

"You're amazing, Mii-kun, just like a hero."

"Today will be remembered as the day that our dear Misaki started her way to the godhood doing the impossible. I'm sure that legends and songs about her heroic deeds will be passed on to the new generations."

Seeing this cherful vision of her friends having fun, Kanon could only smile. She may not know how Misaki opened this jar, maybe the dynamite explosion managed to loosen the jar's lid, maybe she have an Arctotherium like strength and didn't even realized the jar tightness or maybe It was just a miracle, but Kanon is sure that just like this mansion kitchen, Misaki is also Kokoroproof.


End file.
